3 Tips for Parenting with a Baby and Toddler

When I became a Mama, it was one of the most joyful days of my life! There was so much learning and growing that first year, not only for our baby but for me as a Mama. From learning about feeding, sleepless nights to watching all the milestones our daughter was making. My favorite part was hearing “Mama” for the first time and later when she was a little older hearing “love you”. Every high and low taught me how to be a Mama and prepared for other children we would have. 

My husband and I had always envisioned a larger family, so when the time came for our second child, we were excited! We were looking forward to having a playmate and best friend for our oldest. While we had heard that transitioning from no children to one could be challenging, we found going from one to two to be a bit smoother. This was true to an extent. We knew what to expect – the late-night feedings, the extra cuddles, the inevitable chaos – and we prepared accordingly.  

Tips to prepare for baby number 2

• Stock up on diapers, wipes, creams 
• Sorting through hand-me down clothes we saved from our oldest 
• Rested when I could and took more naps  
• Cleaned the bassinet and other baby items 
• Set up a nighttime basket filled with diapers, wipes, cream, suction bulb and saline 
• Involved our daughter in preparing for her sister 

When our little girl arrived, just as we were with our oldest, we felt overjoyed and happy! Even though we had prepared and mostly knew what to expect, there were still some challenges that came with adding a new little baby.  

Things I didn’t prepare for & realized after having baby number 2 

• Our eldest still craved my undivided attention. This made it difficult to tend to the needs of our newborn while meeting her demands. My husband was wonderful and helped her with most of the things she needed, but it was more difficult when he went back to work.  
• There were days when I wanted a nap from lack of sleep but couldn’t with a toddler running around. The famous advice to “sleep when the baby sleeps” couldn’t be followed with more than one child.
• Feeling pulled in both directions for each girl was challenging. Trying to tend to a crying newborn while preparing lunch for my hungry toddler proved difficult at times. 

But through all of that, some of the sweetest moments came from my oldest. She would “shhh” her little baby sister or talk to her in hopes to of calming her down. Our oldest was the perfect big helper as well! On days when I was extra tired, she would snuggle on the couch with me. And she developed an even stronger relationship with her Daddy. 
 
There is so much learning when it comes to having a baby, whether it’s the first time or the second. All babies are different, and they all have unique needs. Toddlers also have their own needs. Managing it all can be very stressful at times. 

3 Valuable Lessons with a New Baby and Toddler

1. Give myself grace: I had to accept that some tasks, like emptying the dishwasher or cleaning the kitchen, wouldn’t get accomplished. Prioritizing my newborn and her needs with her sister was the most important. It was a time of learning and growing as a Mama. I had to figure out how to manage with a newborn and toddler while my husband was at work. I also had to give myself grace if I wasn’t able to do as much for my toddler. To accept that sometimes I had to let her watch TV longer than I would have liked while tending to our newborn.
2. Create a list: Once I felt more healed and could do more, I started creating lists to help with getting household tasks done. I have always loved lists and being able to cross things off. It makes me feel so accomplished, so it was helpful with having two kids. It made me feel as though I was accomplishing a lot, even though it started off very small. I’d put things like unload the dishwasher, clean off the counter, and read the Bible. I know it seems silly, but doing these tasks on my list helped me to establish a routine for myself and my girls during the day. 
3. Get out of the house: I’ve always heard that when you’re a stay-at-home Mama, it’s important to get out of the house every day. This is so true. Getting out of the house and going to the playground or just walking around a store was so beneficial to me and my mindset. It also helped us break up the day and made it move faster. 

Transitioning from one child to two was undoubtedly challenging, but it also brought with it a newfound sense of confidence and resilience. As our family grows and evolves, I am reminded to embrace the journey, learn, adapt, and extend grace to myself on difficult days.

In the end, each trial and triumph only serve to strengthen the bonds that hold us together as a family as we navigate this beautiful, messy, and infinitely rewarding journey of parenthood together.